Nurse Rowdy

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Colorado Mesa University (CMU) students and faculty were met with some shocking news this past week as our school mascot, Rowdy, has been accepted into the CMU nursing program in a sudden switch of passions.

Last Wednesday, Rowdy was spotted entering the Health Sciences building to apply and interview for a spot in the competitive nursing program. Allegedly, he performed a series of front flips and back handsprings then raised both thumbs up and said, “Health. Nursing. I can do this.”

The CMU nursing community let him into the program, no questions asked, saying he was, “An incredibly promising future nurse and a beacon of hope for the healthcare world.”

Rowdy has been denying many media requests as he appears to have let this newfound respect and seat of power go to his bulky, weirdly proportioned head. Rowdy was overheard mentioning he would like to use his nursing degree to study human behavior and brain functions to get some answers to questions that weigh heavily on his mind, such as, “Why do humans want me to be in this costume all the time?” and, “Do they all just pretend to like me and pretend to know what a maverick is?”

Fans, as well as people close to Rowdy, have been speculating he may also take his talents to veterinary school to study mavericks in the wild and discover where these creatures actually are. At a recent press event Rowdy was very conflicted on the concept of mavericks and his role in maverick society.

He was quoted saying, “A maverick is a cattle of sorts that has not been branded, yet I walk through this world every day branded by Colorado Mesa University. I’ve been simplified and demeaned my entire life, a walking contradiction. I will not allow mavericks to slip through the cracks of society, I am a nurse now and this is a major step forward in creating a world that sees mavericks as more than just beasts in a field.”

Rowdy assisted nurses working at a blood donation opportunity a few days ago and some CMU students were serviced by Rowdy in his first venture into serving the community and inspiring change through healthcare. Claire Bluddrive was serviced by Rowdy at this blood drive and described the experience as, “Surreal and a little bit uncomfortable, his fingers are not the ideal size to be working with medical instruments and needles.”