Mental health doesn’t exist

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Good news for all of those diagnosed with any form of mental illness: it’s not real!

We’ve all heard the myths of stress, depression and anxiety. How they can affect your mental health and therefore your grades, social life and cleanliness. Within a recent study called “It’s all in your head”, scientists have actually verified that none of it can possibly be real. 

This is due to the fact that mental illness cannot hurt you without consent. Just look in a mirror and practice saying no! If any voices speak back, well, ignore them. 

In an effort to close all mental wellness institutions, doctors have helped their patients say no by making them realize that mental illness is not fun at all. If it’s no fun, why have it at all? Some of their treatments include slight electric shocks and ice water torture. 

As college students, we should all be smart enough to look at our brains and internalize the fact that stress is not real and our professors should actually give us more work.