If Flappy Bird were a woman, she would be a tramp. A cheap and easy good time that only lasts about a minute and always leaves you wanting more. You can’t do homework or hang out with your friends because you know that her seductive fun is only a click away. You see her doing the same thing to everyone else around you, but for some reason you just can’t let her go. She’s got you by the balls, and you know it.

Fortunately, it is not a heartbreaking dame, but a bird looking to stay afloat for as long as possible, and it is the latest addictive game to hit the app store. Flappy Bird has exploded onto the scene and currently has the number one spot for most free downloads for both Android and iPhone. With the help of social media, the game skyrocketed to the top of those charts basically overnight. Many people, including myself, are baffled by the game’s popularity, considering the artwork is unmistakably ripped off from Super Mario Bros. as well as the helicopter-style gameplay that we have been using to kill time at the office/classroom for years. Regardless, developer Dong Ngyuen and .GEARS studios slapped together a game that has risen to popularity at blinding speed.

The concept is simple: guide the hapless bird that you control through a maze of protruding tunnels without touching anything. Earn a point for every gap the bird passes through successfully and continue to do so until you mess up (which you undoubtedly will). That’s it. It seems simple, and it is, but the sensitivity of the game is the aggravating part. The smallest, most subtle touch of the tail feather on any part of the tunnel causes instant death, and everything you’ve worked for comes crashing to the ground in an instant. It is reminiscent of the days of NES with the 8-bit graphics and a time before the option of saving a game was discovered.

Flappy Bird is a never-ending offline competition that pins you against the rest of the smart phone world. There are no teams, clans or anyone that you have to depend on to help improve your score. It’s all up to whether you have a hot hand today or not. The peaks are glorious, and the valleys are beyond frustrating. The amount of emotion put into such a simple game is staggering, but effective.

Despite the stolen graphics, poor placement of banner ads and the hair-pulling effect of losing, Flappy Bird is pretty entertaining. It’s easy to play, doesn’t require any thought and it’s free. Just to be able to ask someone else what their best score is and laugh in their face when you’ve beaten it is the most satisfaction you will garner from this game.

(As of Jan. 8, Ngyuyen removed Flappy Bird from Apple’s App Store and Google Play, citing undue popularity.)

★★☆☆☆

mfreter@mavs.coloradomesa.edu