Located in: Opinions
Posted on: October 20th, 2013 3 Comments

The importance of mastering sexting etiquette

Let’s all be honest — at some point or another, we have all participated in a naughty exchange of messages to that hottie we met at the party last weekend whom we wanted to bone but our friend was like, “No, we have to go home — I’m tired.” Ugh.

We’ve all done it. But did you know there’s a set of rules and proper etiquette to sexting?
Sexting is the act of sending sexually explicit messages and/or photographs, primarily between mobile phones. Or, as comedian Hal Sparks so eloquently defines it, “co-authoring erotica, live, with your partner.”

Let’s start off with the right way to initiate sexting. You definitely do not want to send a peen pic upfront. You need to test the waters a little first. After talking for a few, Urban Dictionary suggests trying something along these lines:

“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you and the things I’d like to do to you” (winky face optional).

Now the ball’s in their court and one of two things will happen. Either the conversation will escalate and you will — hopefully — go to bed mediocrely satisfied (I mean, your hands can only do so much), or you will suffer rejection.

Let’s look into the first scenario. You played your cards right, and the sexting is on.

Rule number one: Pacing. You need to keep steady pace between your texts and try not to get too distracted while sexting your partner. A lagged text can cause frustration and panic. Do your best to focus on the sexting without getting distracted. It’ll save yourself and your partner tears and insecurity.

Rule number two: word choice. When testing the waters, you should attempt to establish the type of scenario you two are going for. You don’t want to say something crude when he’s leaning toward a Casanova approach. And please monitor your autocorrect. “Lick my puppy” can really ruin the mood if you’re not careful.

So the sexts are getting steamy, but you want that little extra something to spice things up. Cue the camera phone and rule number three: Dirty pics.

Now, I have read numerous articles that conflict each other on the etiquette of taking dirty pictures. Some say don’t do it, some say go for it and others say to stay mostly clothed so it leaves something to the imagination.

It’s really up to your personal preference on how comfortable you are with your partner seeing parts of your body. The one consistent tip I read between the articles was to keep your face out of the picture — it is bound to be shown to his/her friends. Let’s be honest with ourselves, if we get an impressive naughty picture, we’re going to show someone or save it for later. In a poll by Cosmopolitan, 78 percent of people involved in sexting share or save the sexy photos they receive. So protect yourselves and keep your face out of that frame.

What I think we should take from this is that sexting is a pretty cool thing if you do it right. Be mindful of when you’re sending the texts, what you send and how feisty your partner is feeling. Other than that, sext on.



3 Responses

  1. pumapirate says:

    “exchanging messages with that hottie we wanted to bone”?
    Wow! So we’re all just sex objects to each other, merely existing to gratify each other’s basic instincts.
    Whatever happened to conscience and to a sense of shame? Oh, wait… some minute residual of shame must still exist since you also wrote, “keep your face out of the picture… protect yourselves and keep your face out of that frame.”
    Trust me, young lady…. you do not (unless you already are) want to marry a guy who fits the above description. He will always be after other “hotties to bone” besides you. He will always be looking for some “strange” after prolonged sex with you becomes boring. Of course, that may not bother you if you also are checking out guys who you’d like to bone you. How sad! No wonder the phrase, “defining deviancy down.”

  2. KawaiiWaifus says:

    pumapirate: Firstly, it’s pretty clear that you only read the first paragraph, then skimmed the rest. There is noE need to personally attack Emilie. On top of that, your argument is a logical fallacy called a strawman argument (an argument that assumes that your opponent believes something).

    Sex is not shameful for everyone, nor is sexting. This is simply etiquette for those who choose to participate in it. Not everybody holds your worldviews – don’t try to force yours on them.

  3. pumapirate says:

    Sorry, Kawaii, you didn’t read very well. I never said sex was shameful. It’s a good gift of God. Reducing it to mere “boning” another person is a perversion of this good gift.
    As for “not everybody holds your worldviews- don’t try to force yours on them”, that is the typical response of someone who feels free to write their opinion, but feels “attacked” when someone else disagrees.
    As for “Not everyone holds your worldviews,” don’t expect that to mean that people who hold moral and spiritual values of actual substance to thus keep quiet.
    Not everyone holds your views either, and have as much right to express theirs as you do yours, except of course, when we respond, we’re “forcing’ ours on you. Grow up, Son. If you can’t handle the heat, get out of the kitchen.

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