I recently saw a status on Facebook that said, “I want to find my own Christian Grey.” The post was referring to the main character of the popular erotic fiction trilogy, “Fifty Shades of Grey.” In the series, 27-year-old multi-billionaire CEO Christian Grey falls in love with 22-year-old Ana Steele. He introduces her to his lavish lifestyle along with his obsession with BDSM — rough sex, usually involving a dominant and submissive as well as various forms of sexual torture.
Grey is the definition of a gentleman, escorting Steele all over the country in his personal helicopter, buying her anything she needs or desires, including an Audi, MacBook, Blackberry and an iPad. Not to mention he gives her the best sex of her life, making sure that she is completely satisfied every time.
As I read this status I couldn’t help but notice a comment under it that said, “Don’t hold your breath. Chivalry is dead.” I laughed to myself because the girl who claims chivalry is dead has a profile picture of her in a bikini that’s a size too small, holding a PBR and proudly rocking the duck face.
Of course she thinks chivalry is dead — it’s women like her who killed it.
The difference between this particular girl and Ana Steele of “Fifty Shades of Grey” is that Steele had just graduated college with a degree in English and 4.0 GPA, was an independent and intelligent young woman with endless drive and a simplistic and natural beauty. She hardly drank and was a virgin until she met Grey.
When a woman presents herself hammered, dancing on tables and trying to bag an athlete for the night, that is all she becomes – fun for the night. There is no need or opportunity for chivalry.
How many times have you heard a girl say “suck my d***,” or “I’m trying to get laid.” It seems I hear that out of girls’ mouths on campus all the time. Granted, I understand they don’t literally have the appendages to be seriously making those requests, however, these are the lovely ladies who are criticizing men for not being gentlemen. Gentlemen date women. The difference between girls and women is that girls want attention, hence the bikini profile picture, the outrageous comments, the offensive language and the need to hook up or flirt with as many guys possible.
Women want respect. They have respect for themselves. They have confidence, pride, intelligence and class. That’s the kind of female who attracts men like Christian Grey. These are the women who obtain healthy and successful relationships. This is, in part, because they are not desperately searching to be in a relationship or for male attention. They are self-reliant, confident and comfortable with themselves. And in the end, that’s what’s sexy.
This column’s intention isn’t to preach, but instead, advise. It’s college. We don’t have to grow up quite yet. But we are forming the foundation of our adult lives here at CMU and should act accordingly. So, to the girl shotgunning a PBR, pour it in a Solo cup. To the girl yelling “YOLO” as she drunkenly strips down to her bra — you only live once, so why contract an STD at age 20 and live with it for the rest of your life? And finally, to the girl with the too-small-bikini profile picture, less is not more. Leave a little to the imagination. And pray the guy’s imagination does you justice because chivalry is dead. Girls like you are clutching the dagger, leaving the rest of us, women, to clean up the mess.