Katie Schultz

News Editor

 

Shock and devastation. These are two emotions felt when a loved one has been killed in a domestic violence episode. After the death of MSC graduate Jeana Vargas, it is during the days that follow when people wonder if they could have done something to prevent the tragedy. 

“It’s an epidemic,” said the Victim’s Advocate of the Police (VAP), whos’ name has been kept anonymous for safety reasons. 

In 2008, 631 domestic violence cases were filed in Mesa County. 

“It’s not peaches and cream. It is life in its roughest and rawest form,” he said.

He has worked with crime victims for 14 years, and he said three fourths of the cases they deal with are related to domestic violence. A VAP is called to a crime scene “for those that are left behind,” at the scene. They are trained to scan the situation, and in this case provide support and get medical attention to the man or woman who has been abused. However, some of the things they do simply come down to connection. “A lot of what we do is just listen,” the VAP said.

 Why they stay

Renee Patterson is Case Manager for Latimer House, an organization that provides support and safe houses for victims of domestic violence. According to her, it takes seven to 11 tries for a victim to leave a domestic violence situation before they are gone for good. This is one of the most vulnerable and dangerous times for the victim.

There are many reasons why a victim will continue to go back and it boils down to either the abuser making a threat or offering coercion. This could involve threatening to take the kids or killing the pets to giving the victim gifts or apologizing. 

Yet, it even comes down to something as pure as hope. 

“For some reason (the victim) still loves the guy,” the VAP said.

Yet, the impact of domestic violence is far reaching. “It impacts everyone that (the victim) knows,” Patterson said. “But the second victim is always the children.”

According to Patterson, even if the children are not being abused it can still be traumatizing. They can act out or have nightmares and even begin to take on characteristics of the parents by either trying to protect their family or start abusing others themselves.

 What to look out for?

Domestic violence comes in many forms of both physical and verbal abuse, but in order to stop the violence everyone needs to know the signs. 

“Arm yourself with knowledge,” Patterson said. “Ignorance keeps control.” 

According to Patterson, there are several key things to look out for. “It’s all about keeping control and power (for the abuser),” she said.

One, beware of isolation. A tactic of an abuser is to cut their victim off from everyone they are in contact with. This gives them control and it makes the victim feel like they have nowhere else to go. Also, once the victim becomes isolated the abuser uses verbal abuse to the point where a victim begins to believe anything their abuser tells them, like they are worthless or have no one else.

Two, beware of separation anxiety and irrational jealousy. Often an abuser is extremely jealous and needs control. The victim will begin to become fearful and nervous when separated and they begin to constantly check in with their abuser. Victims can even stop talking about their abuser all together, because they are ashamed of the situation. 

Three, beware of changes in dress and personality. If there has been physical abuse a victim will begin to cover the marks up by wearing long dresses or turtle necks. Also, a victim who once was outgoing and upbeat can become quiet and reserved.   

 Where do we go from here?

If an individual witnesses domestic violence taking place do not hesitate to call 911. 

The first thing to do for a victim is to offer support without passing judgement or pushing them. “They are already being controlled by their abuser. The last thing they want to be is controlled by you too,” Patterson said. 

The best thing to do is show the victim concern and offer support as simple as listening. This at least makes them feel like they have somewhere else to go.

There are also several different organizations in the community that offer support for victims of abuse.

Latimer House provides several different services for victims of abuse. According to Patterson, they help 130 victims of domestic violence per year, and house 10-12 victims at a time in their safe houses. The majority of their residents are between the ages of 25 and 35 years-old. Some of the services they provide include a 24/7 victim’s crisis hotline at 970-241-6704, support groups four days a week, and case managers who provide community resources and guidance to help the victim leave their situation. They also provide safe houses for when there is an immediate threat, but no proof is required. “It is all taken as face value,” Patterson said.

At Mesa State, there are several different services provided to any student. Behavioral Clinical Services (BCS) provides free counseling to students and can be contacted at 970-241-6500. There is also the Escort Service, which can be reached at 970-260-2683. They will provide safe travel for any MSC student, faculty, and staff member around the campus.

“Domestic violence is an ugly thing that happens out of site,” said John Marshall, vice president for student affairs. “There is a place in this office for anyone to come and get help.”

Domestic violence is always a tragedy, but in order to stop it something needs to be learned from it. “Don’t let your guard down,” Patterson said, “and always have a plan.”

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kschultz@mesastate.edu