by Julia Sundstrom
Sometimes it takes many relationships to realize what you want in life. It might even take a whole season of life with terrible people and heartbreak until you find the man/woman of your dreams. Sometimes it might take only one to know that you found your person with whom you plan to spend the rest of your life with. Whoever you might be on this list, kudos to living.
I have had countless conversations with peers about the thought of marriage in college and how many of our parents were married at our age. Just because many of us college students are not ready for marriage, it’s still important to understand and respect the choice of those married college students.
First, let’s begin with the countless stereotypes that we are all thinking when the subject of young marriage is brought up. Young marriage is often times thought to be old-fashioned, be weirdly religious, strengthen anti-feminist ideals, be wholeheartedly inexperienced and destined for divorce.
Sometimes young marriage might seem that way or whatever else you might be thinking, but in all reality, that is not the case for every young married couple. It is a lot more retrospective than you might think. Marrying young in college can be more beneficial than a prematurely conceived notion or appalling future.
Let’s just think, if you knew that the person you were dating was the one, then why wouldn’t you get married? Getting married young is overlooked with judgment or stereotypes, but it’s not recognized for the richness that it brings to a young married couple’s life both during college and all the way up until death do they part.
“Having a husband while in college is great!” McKenna Phillips-Yoder, who recently married the same boy he’s been with since high school before her last big semester of college, said, “He gives me encouragement and support to do my very best, and at the end of the day I have someone to lean on for anything and everything.”
Getting married young in college means you always have a study buddy, motivator, wedding date, psychiatrist, dance partner, adventure buddy, biggest cheerleader or ___________ (fill in the blank).
“Dating was uncomfortable,” Phillips-Yoder said, “and I wouldn’t wish to go back to that time in my life. No more having to dress up every day to try to look cute for guys. No more having to feel like [I] have to be social in order to meet someone.”
Married in college means fewer nights spent in a bar socializing with all your close single friends, who are chasing after love. Instead, it is about coming home to a person, who also understands everything you’re going through and helps you face struggles or challenges. It’s about going to the bars with all of your friends and being the hottest or most passionate couple there.
Married college students are usually thought to live an inexperienced life of their younger years, but instead of making fools of themselves at least they will have each other. They will grow up together and experience so much more in a lifetime together. They will even share more milestones from graduating college, paying off student loans, and all of the firsts in life.
Some college students are fortunate enough to land their dream job working for an NFL team, but realistically, many of our first big-kid jobs will be interesting, tough and helpful. You’ll have a much easier time navigating your 20s with a partner. It will allow for more accountability and motivation to be successful in reaching your professional and academic goals.
Phillip-Yoder’s marriage has affected her in more ways than one.
“Marriage has helped me be a better student and a better person,” she said, “It’s helped me determine where my priorities lie. It helped me learn how to balance all aspects of my life.”
Finances are almost always an excuse brought up in every aspect of life, especially in college and marriage. As a young married couple of college students, you probably wouldn’t waste money because what college student actually has money to spend? Ultimately, you will watch your bank account rise and fall from empty to hopefully more than you will need to retire.
Many men and women all around America are postponing marriage to their late twenties or beyond to help improve their chances of a successful career and/or a marriage that doesn’t end in divorce. The other couples who decided to marry young and during college will have much more time to focus on each other and their careers instead of rushing those priorities to have kids.
If it’s the happiness or dance party for life that seals the deal, then just know it’s okay to get married in college. You don’t have to, but it’s always an option if you are comfortable with proclaiming you found the one.
Phillip-Yoder’s relationship is helping change and grow her, but this does not mean that early marriage is for everyone. Just know that there are other married couples on campus and take pride in it.
