Stop Apologizing

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Canadians are known as the most apologetic people in the world. But if you ask a Canadian, they’ll simply tell you that they are just being polite. In our modern society, particularly in younger generations, we’re known to apologize for everything. Don’t believe me? Count how many times you say sorry in a day or even a week. But by over-apologizing, I think we take value away from the word “sorry”. In general, there’s a lot we apologize for that we shouldn’t have to. Here’s a list of things to stop apologizing for. 

  • Following your dreams and achieving your goals

Trying to make it through your 20’s is when achieving things regularly turns into achieving things occasionally. We’re all working towards bigger, longer-term goals. We want careers, homes and families. Those take time. But when you achieve something, be proud of it. Those who support you will be proud of you too; they won’t hold you down because they’re comparing your success timeline to theirs’. 

  • Your taste in music

I made a playlist full of old Jonas Brothers and Hannah Montana soundtracks the other day. I originally named it guilty pleasure soundtrack, but honestly, I have nothing to feel guilty about. Not sorry at all. 

  • Who you like

You’re not going to be attracted to everyone. We all have things we are attracted to in people. We can stop apologizing for being attracted to certain qualities, and unattracted to others. You like what you like. 

  • Changing your mind

Decision-making is hard and if you feel like it’s a good idea to change your mind, do it. Change your hair color, change your major, or back out of the lease if you don’t think it’s going to be a good idea. Life is too short to be stuck with something or somewhere you don’t want to be. 

  • Holding people accountable

If people make promises to you, hold them to that. If they make promises to themselves, hold them to that. If they make promises to others, hold them to that. Confrontation about accountability is something friends do for friends. If people aren’t in your life to bring value to it and better it, why are they there?

  • What you wear

I was standing at the Art Gallery of Ontario and watched a man, in his thirties with big circular glasses and a toddler on his hip, walk up to the tickets desk. Everyone was staring at him for his bight (BRIGHT) orange pants. They were terrific. You wear your orange pants if you want to. 

  • How much money you make

We all start somewhere. We also all have different situations. If you make more money than your friends and associates, congratulations. If you make less than your friends and associates, it’s okay. Capitalism is going to do that to us for the rest of our lives, but we all work hard and we’re all trying to get somewhere, and money is not an accurate representation of that. 

  • Trying new things

Take up piano, learn to ski, learn to skate, or take that class on dancing. I can’t be the only person that wants to keep learning how to do things I didn’t learn how to do as a kid. I think I stayed away from it so long because when I went into something new, I noticed people already skilled with things I was learning looking down on me. I’m not sorry for trying to better myself. 

  • Not knowing everything about everything

I don’t know all the answers asked in class. I don’t have the histories and experiences of my peers. There’s something to be learned and appreciated in each of them. Don’t apologize for learning new things. 

  • Taking care of yourself

People get sick and people need secure mental health. Prioritizing yourself first is a must. You work better when you’re healthy and rested, just like everyone else. Saying no to things in order to make that a personal initiative is your right as a human being. 

Image courtesy of Noah Stahlecker | The Criterion